How to Date a Girl

Dating is still traditional: boy asks girl.  Girl can ask guy, but the percentage of that happening is probably still pretty low.  In these twenty-something times, I think most guys understand the basic concept of asking girls on dates.  From liking a girl or just thinking that she seems pretty cool to asking her out to continuous dating with little/great make out sessions, it is all a great game.  We all love it, but know its never that easy.  So, I wrote this post just to reiterate and maybe add some insight to what some girls like and what we think when boys ask us out.

You know how much I love the number/bullet system, so here it goes.

Step 1. Talk to her.  I know talking doesn’t sound that hard, but for some of us, there is that shyness factor.  I understand being in the real world that meeting new people out of the friend group is a lot harder.  But no one can go on a date unless someone talks to one another.  So suck it up, strut, and talk to her.  We probably noticed each other at one point in the night; we all scan-and-tag who is there, so come say hello.  Talking is really saying that you that are making the effort to come talk to us.  We notice and we like when guys make the initiation.

I know a lot of the world is into this “text-sex” stuff, especially you iphoners, aka you resort to texting.  Texting can be really fun for both guy and girl, but to everyone, man up and talk to each other too.  The element of texting has opened up a huge communication portal for flirting and yes, I love it too, but I think a lot of girls like to talk face to face too.  And this isn’t some stereotypical emotional-woman bit, but a normacy of the human world.

hipsters on their phones, geeze.

Step 2. Be friends, but don’t drag out the friendship unless you just want to be friends. Being friends is important, it helps feel things out and see if you really want to pursue her.  Again, talk to her in group settings, kinda pay attention to what she is talking about so you can follow up the next time.  And if the opportunity arises or if you can find a good excuse to get her number, get it. It is pretty easy to get especially if you have seen each other a few times.  And even if you do not end up wanting to date her, why not have another friend.

Step 3. After hanging out with her a few times and you still like her, ask her out!  Now I know that it is a lot harder to ask a girl out and as a girl, of course I would not have a clue what it is like to go through all that emotional turmoil.  I know, I am sorry.  But the game can only go on for so long.  If we were bolder and had more confidence, I am sure we would do it, but we thank you for taking one for the team and asking us out.

Even after asking her out, we know that it doesn’t just end there.  Now we have steps within steps!  So what did she say?!

a. YES! Whooo! Success! (or that AliG snappy thing!) Schedule a time and place. It can be a simple date, nothing too elaborate, but a little originality is always a plus.  Girls like to be surprised and/or like when guys make decisions because it shows confidence and control.

But even after a yes, you have to plan where to take her, and I guess it would be better if you knew where before hand in case you wanted to mention, hey lets get coffee/hey lets get dinner/hey lets make-out.

• Asking to take a coffee = Ok, so he cannot muster to ask me on a dinner date, but this is safe and easy ground.  He wants to get to know me one-on-one.  Could just be a friendly take out or maybe the break point moving forward.  No expectations, probably no hand holding or kiss at the end of the date.
• Asking to dinner = Dang, he might really like me, wants to go for the classic night out and what a gentleman. A little hand holding, a little peck at the end of the night or maybe a lot of pecks.
• Asking to the museum/park/site seeing = This guy is really something, gotta give him cool and creative points.
• Asking for a freakin’ weekend baby I’m about to have me some fun — (jk)

b. MAYBE. Apparently there are a lot of maybes, so here are a few of confused-maybe options:
> She probably just crushed smiled right then and will eventually say yes. When you get a maybe, it isn’t a no and she has definitely thought about you.
> She probably feels awkward and does not know how to put you down – she knows she should be saying no, but feels bad and says yes.
> She probably does not know her schedule and that can be a genuine answer. We can be really busy!  (stop saying bullshit to my blog)

c. NO. Drown your sorrows with beer.

Sorry, I don’t have a better idea, but it sure sounds ok to me.  Hopefully you do get the yes and things turn out for the best.  But like I said, it is hard to meet new people and go on dates.  But for guys, they have the upper hand and kind of get to control who they want to date.  You get to ask who you want out.  I know its not great to have a girl decline, but you get another chance.  Girls do not get to always pick who they want to date.  We get to choose who we want to like, but it is not always certain that we will get a date with who we would like.  Its a dumb and confusing world.  Screw it. Let’s just get married.